I had not realized the conflicts within and how much life would be a strain, holding onto the grudges that weighed me down, and my feelings of inner pain.
Flashes of memories of yesteryear, and the struggles that put me to the test. I never fully healed from the traumas and open wounds that have hindered me from being my best.
The letdowns, heartaches, and disappointments; so much misery like never before. The bullies, the molesters, deadbeat fathers, those ancestors who have defiled you, and much more.
We have blamed, we have cried, we have pointed fingers, trying to avoid the events of a marred past. We have cursed their names and wished for their demise; their punishment set to last.
We wish they knew the error of their ways and fessed up to their offenses and crimes. No matter how hard we wish for absolution, our healing had needed more time.
There is a task we must perform as survivors. An assignment we have been called upon to do. To forgive and forget without their apology. It is time that we heal and let the past flow through.
They may never understand the hurt they have caused you. They may never know why you have been crying. Those things are not important to us anymore. We are no longer hurting inside or slowly dying.
There is no debt of pain to settle, a vendetta to pursue, or revenge to settle the score. But I hope you heal from the things no one has ever apologized to you for.
I hope you find someone who makes you happy, lifts you, and shines a spotlight on you. I hope your special someone is a healer and a comforter who lifts your spirits when you are blue.
It will take a special person with patience and drive to motivate you to be your best. I hope you have found The One who completes you and lifts you up above the rest.
I hope you go on to live a fulfilling life, a life of happiness, living the dream. Grow old and prosper surrounded by your family and friends who are proud of your accomplishments and esteem.
We are conquerors, survivors, and champions too. We cannot let the past continue to bring us down. We must rise above the madness, try to avoid the sadness, and keep our feet planted firmly on solid ground.
Do not go to the dark place or a place of dejection that you have avoided for so many years. You have managed to stay content and joyous always, avoiding sadness and the falling of tears.
I know some memories will return like they always do, that get you back in a miserable mood, but you are a survivor of the trauma you have overcome, and you walk head held high with a positive attitude.
We are not the product of our circumstances. We are survivors with a unique legacy to preserve. We are moving on towards a higher purpose destined and suited for our healing. We may never get the justice that we deserve.
We may never see the striking revenge of karma. We do not need that kind of satisfaction anymore. Lift your head and continue on with your inspiring journey; and I hope you heal from the things no one has ever apologized to you for.
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